13 Funny Things We Do With The Hopes Of Getting Laid
Humans are 'social animals' and therefore we have certain needs we want to be met. While chasing opportunities to meet some of our needs, we develop some strategies. This situation gets funnier when that certain need is getting laid, approaching our mates and taking things to the next level in a suitable and appropriate environment.
Here are some things that people usually do thinking 'What if I get laid?' and see if 'a friend' of yours exhibits the same behavior. :)
1. Shaving or waxing because you never know what happens and when...
It isn't the case that any woman who resorts to hair removal in her special area hopes to get lucky, however, it is one of the first and most basic moves of a woman who is indeed assuming that she might get laid.
2. Giving your date a ride home hoping to be offered a coffee upstairs.
Anybody who has thought 'Maybe we will have a cup of coffee upstairs and things can escalate nicely.' has done this. We don't know to what extent this succeeds. Why don't you let us know? :)
3. Not wearing the ugliest underwear that you usually don't have a problem with wearing..
These are mostly bought by moms and are taken off at the speed of light as soon as there is a possibility to get lucky. Instead, you wear cool, Lycra, black underwear as if you were David f*cking Beckham. This type of underwear is called 'I might get laid underwear.'
4. Skipping onion and garlic for lunch.
This should be one of the biggest tortures one can put themselves through because that sh*t is yummy, yo!
5. Upgrading your socks game.
You normally have no problems with the holes in your socks through which your toes pop out. However, if there is a chance to get lucky, you wear your best socks! Don't deny it, you've done this. :)
6. Trying with messages...
This one is called DM (direct message) flirting. But I don't know if it is good to be this 'direct.'
7. Carrying a condom in the most secret part of your wallet.
It is only because of this 'hope' that most guys have condoms old enough to be considered a cultural heritage. God knows when it was put there. It even left a mark in the leather of the wallet. LOL!
8. Trusting the years-long cliche and buying dinner...
Sometimes we hope that if we buy drinks and food for someone, they will feel like they owe us and will be more willing to get on with it. Until they say 'I have to go now, see you later.' as soon as you pay the bill.
9. Changing the bed sheets you have had on your bed for centuries.
This is the lowest point a lazy person can hit. If a person goes as far as changing the sheets, making a great effort; and no intercourse takes place, that person might be psychologically scarred forever.
10. Preparing a playlist to set the mood...
How can anyone be so confident and funny at the same time? Let's say you indeed end up with someone in your room. Will you be like 'Just a sec.' in the middle of foreplay and go on YouTube? I mean are you serious?
11. Telling super sad stories about yourself.
Guys usually do this. I guess that's what real desperation looks like. Good luck in life.
12. Shaving until you look as smooth as an egg.
Some guys who usually like to grow a beard, prefer to shave before meeting ladies so that their beard won't disturb the ladies while making out. But in reality, they are most likely not gonna meet anyone; but hoping thankfully doesn't cost anything. :)
13. Posting super cute photos with cats and dogs on Instagram.
Anybody who loves the sh*t out of their pets, of course, will and can share photos with them; but there are some others who do it only with the hopes of getting laid, which is often quite obvious.
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