Still Thinking Of Your Ex? Here Are 12 Suggestions To Help You Move On!
News > Still Thinking Of Your Ex? Here Are 12 Suggestions To Help You Move On!
How to forget someone you loved? Learning how to move on and forget people is easier than following tips in women's magazines and blogs by self styled relationship experts. Letting go of memories and filling the emotional absence of a loved one from your life is encapsulated by the idea of embracing change and a new beginning. Whether it is an ex-girlfriend, ex-boyfriend, ex-bff, former colleague or a cheating partner, these tips will help in cleansing your mind of their memories.
1. Stop talking to the person you want to forget
If you want to forget someone, the first crucial step is to stop communicating with him or her. Don't expect to get them out of your head if you are communicating with them, even in a seemingly insignificant way.
Whether it is a text message, random phone call to say hi, a post on his or her Facebook timeline or a tagged tweet, the slightest of idea of being in touch with that person will bring back memories and remind you of their presence in your life.
2. Look at how other people have moved on
Whenever you are feeling lonely and alone because you are missing a certain someone, think about how they have moved on.
Forgetting someone you loved or someone who was very close to your heart is by no means an easy thing to do. But you must remember that if that person has moved on himself/herself, you are punishing yourself for no reason by feeling glum, sad and heartbroken.
3. Forgive and forget
In the end, forgetting someone is virtually impossible to do if you can’t forgive them. If you still can’t manage to forget, work on forgiving instead. They’re just a human and things happen. Life goes on.
Don’t forget to forgive yourself. For many of us, we hold grudges against ourselves more easily than we hold grudges against others. Remember that at the time, you did what you thought was right. They did, too. No one is to blame or is at fault. The past is in the past and it’s going to stay there. And that is for the best – this way, you’re free to move on.
4. Remove him or her from your electronic life.
In today’s day and age, the people we associate with are more often than not through a screen. Even if you don’t see the person, it’s far too easy to see what they’re up to. Though it may seem harsh, remove him or her from all the forms of social media that you use.
5. Value yourself.
Odds are, this person you’re trying to forget did you some kind of wrong. In the end, they didn’t value you like they should’ve. This is the type of person that shouldn’t be in your life anyway. By valuing yourself, it’s much easier to realize that. They didn’t treat you right and that’s that. You only surround yourself with people who do.
Keeping in mind your self-worth will make it much easier to get the ball rolling. Remember: you're awesome! The whole world is in front of you and just bubbling with opportunities. What are you going to do next?
6. Don't let the desire for revenge consume you.
Recognize that wanting to take revenge on someone (by making him or her jealous, upset, or sorry) still qualifies as thinking about them. You can't move on and forget if you're obsessed with vengeance, so learn how to let it go.
7. Do not ask questions that could hurt you.
Asking questions that run along the lines of “Did you ever love me?” and “Am I not good enough?” will just hurt you, or cause tension in your relationship. The goal is to avoid pain, so it’s counterproductive to seek answers to these questions.
8. Allow yourself time.
The human brain is wonderfully self-healing. The old adage “time heals all wounds” has always been true and always will be. Naturally, the brain starts focusing on the here and now, forgetting the past and often modifying it how it sees fit. So if it’s been a few weeks, relax. These things take time. Your brain will do the job for you if you’re patient.
The grieving process is natural and, in most cases,
has to be gone through. There are 5 stages, and they may take a while to complete. Be patient with yourself – you'll see progress as times passes. 9. Stay away from hurtful situations.
If you know that they’re going to be with their partner at a party, don’t show up. Why would you? It’s like committing suicide. Simply decline their invitation and be at peace. Sleeping all day or binge watching your favorite TV show are so much better than seeing the person you love with somebody else.
10. Don’t listen to emotional music or movies.
Trying to forget a person is a set up for mood swings and depression. Right now you may feel like you’re in a very vulnerable place. The last thing you need is outside stimuli that cultivates this emotion, so keep the music you listen to upbeat and only watch feel-good TV or movies.
Ask your friends to keep this in mind, too. They can help keep things light and airy to keep your mind off of things. When you need the boost, call them up, and they'll know just what to do to make you feel better.
11. Keep your mind distracted.
Luckily enough, you control your thoughts. If you don’t want to think about something, you don’t have to. Busy yourself with school, work, or a project that will keep your mind focused. When you have other things to think about, they’ll fade into the background.
12. Finally, don't force yourself to forget someone
If there were a few words of advice that would be almost impossible to master, these would be it. Forcing yourself to forget someone will potentially re-enforce their memory in your mind.
Don't make the process of erasing someone's memory the agenda of your life or a chore to be ticked off from your to-do list. Go about your life as normally as you can. You may feel sad and depressed but this period of your life, when you accept things and move on, is only going to make you strong from inside.