Yeah it's a cliché but I'll say it: Being a mother is probably one of the most magical things in the world. Our moms are just beyond awesome and believe it or not, they actually go through a lot while you don't really notice anything!
1. Pooping during childbirth is pretty common. Yeah, it happens. It's a shitty deal.
2. Functioning on literally no sleep every day is actually possible. Not just functioning, but keeping another another human alive.
3. Doing things with one hand is one of your best skills.
4. After you deliver the baby, you deliver the placenta.
5. Being puked and pooped on are daily occurrences.
6. Your vagina isn't forever ruined after vaginal childbirth. It shrinks back.
7. Silence is always, ALWAYS suspicious.
8. Your baby "bump" doesn't automatically shrink up after the baby comes out. You don't SUDDENLY have a flat stomach after birth!
9. You'll use Google to research what’s wrong with your kid a minimum of 10 times per day.
10. Sucking boogers out of a kid's nose is pretty typical.
11. Here's no such thing as a "mom" wardrobe. "Mom jeans" are whatever jeans you choose to wear that day, but it's usually sweatpants.
12. It actually takes like three to five days for your breast milk to come in after giving birth; you don't automatically produce it.
13. One shoe is ALWAYS missing. And it's ALWAYS when you're running late.
14. You don't know any new movies or actors, but you can ramble off every single cartoon show, theme song, and character.
15. You are the paparazzi during anything your kid does.
16. The way your kid looks is far more important than the way you look. You might have a poop stain on your shirt, but hey, at least your kid looks cute!
17. A shower is a luxury.
18. Going to the bathroom alone is also a luxury.
19. You always pack the whole house before going anywhere. Diapers? Check. Snacks? Check. Your kid's entire collection of toys? Check.
20. You have a newfound appreciation for your own parents.
21. Most everyday items (like a pencil) are "dangerous."
22. You still have interests outside of your kid. You became a mom — you didn't die.
23. You can't manage to keep your eyes open long enough to finish an entire movie.