The New Dating Trend: What Is ‘Shrekking’?
Nowadays, many people initiate relationships based on physical appearance. However, a connection solely based on attraction can bring its own set of problems over time. The recent trend that has emerged, 'shrekking,' represents a completely opposite approach. That is, choosing to date someone you don't find attractive at first glance, thinking you'll be treated better.
Let's take a closer look...
What exactly is this Shrekking?
Shrekking refers to the act of starting a relationship with people you don't necessarily find attractive, putting physical attraction on the back burner, driven by the notion of 'better behavior'. This approach encourages those who believe that appearances can be deceiving. On the other hand, it can also create an unfair sense of superiority in the person who assumes they have chosen someone 'below their league' based on physical appearance.
As relationship coach Amy Chan points out, in fact, many people in the past have tried to form connections by putting looks aside. The issue arises when this is perceived as dating someone beneath one's level.
Starting a relationship with a "I am superior" mindset already lays an unbalanced foundation.
Assuming that your partner will treat you better due to their appearance often turns out to be a vain hope. In such situations, people experience what is described as being 'shrekked'. That is, going out with someone they perceive as less attractive, yet still getting hurt.
As one might expect, imbalance in relationships also becomes inevitable... In other words, the problem isn't in the appearance, but in the false assumptions.
Physical attraction cannot be completely disregarded in romantic relationships, but it should not be the sole determinant either.
How the person you're with treats you, how well they align with your values, and whether they're emotionally supportive, are much more defining factors. While Shrekking may sometimes steer people away from more superficial choices, it's controversial due to its risky aspects.
According to experts, the primary focus should be on a person's values, character, and how they make you feel. In other words, looking at behaviors instead of appearances can pave the way for healthier relationships in the long run.
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