What's This?! Demisexuality In 15 Steps!

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Demisexual: someone who feels sexual attraction only to people with whom they have an emotional bond. In other words, a person who is between asexual and sexual, who needs to have emotions for someone to be able to have sex with that person. Before deciding about yourself or your partner, make sure that you have enough information about demisexuality.

1. Demisexual people are the members of an area called Gray-A.

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What is Gray-A?: People in Gray-A sometimes have a good sex life without any problems, and sometimes feel nothing at all. There are also times that they do indeed feel something but don't know what to do with it. Having sex doesn't have to be a way of meeting their needs, or their sex drive may not be that strong. They can enjoy masturbating only; or instead of sex, they can imagine kissing or hugging somebody, imagining that person naked, fantasizing about that person's face and these can be enough for them to climax. They can have an average sex life, however their overall sexual satisfaction is low. They can either not climax, or they can easily climax but the pleasure they get out of it is less. They can also have a healthy sex life by trusting their partners, feeling a strong bond after a long time. All of these things can be observed separately or all together in a person, or different ones in different people. The severity of these signs may or may not be strong enough to affect their relationships. Shortly, it is a very complicated situation. A person comes to the point where they have to accept a lonely life, if not accepted by anybody as they are; or if the situation doesn't improve.

2. Demisexual people are in the secondary sexual attraction model.

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"The primary sexual attraction has to do with the outer qualities of a person, such as their looks, clothes and personality. Secondary sexual attraction stems from a romantic relationship, or a social standing, and develops over time based on a person's relationship and emotional connection with another person."

3. Demisexuals have to spend time with somebody and get to know them before they can become intimate.

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4. Demisexual people don't have sex, they make love.

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5. Demisexuals have to have deep emotions for somebody not only to be able to have sex with them but also to go out to eat or have drinks with them.

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6. Demisexuals are definitely not asexual, they just need much more to have sex.

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7. For demisexuals, sex isn't a goal, it is just a result.

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8. Unlike sexual people, demisexuals aren't sex-oriented , they don't desire someone just because they find them good looking.

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Similarly, unlike asexual people they don't consider sex categorically bad. When it is the right time and the right place, they do enjoy sex.

9. Demisexual people have absolutely no problem with having sex and during sex, they never skip the parts that they enjoy doing with their partner.

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10. Demisexuals know very well that sex isn't the only fun thing in life.

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For example they prefer going for a walk over having sex if they wake up in the middle of the night.

11. The phrase "not being able to have sex without being in love" describes demisexuality.

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12. For demisexual people trust is very important. It comes before romanticism and having deep feelings for that person.

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13. If you are dating a demisexual, you have to know that they do have sexual desires; you first have to give them enough trust, sincerity and intimacy for them to show their desires.

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Even demisexual people's sex drives can be as strong as a nymphomaniac's.

14. Demisexuality isn't a disorder, a shortcoming, a flaw, etc. It is just a preference.

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15. Demisexuals are very loyal people. The concept of 'one night stand' has no place in their lives.

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