Hilarious Stories Of Exhausted Mothers Who Need A Break

WomenFunny-

Moms are the greatest heroes. But what they go through during the first years of raising a child is incredible, and sometimes hilarious. Here is a compilation of exhausted mom stories from Buzzfeed.

Source: https://www.buzzfeed.com/mikespohr/21-hi...

1.

"I screamed when I saw a magazine with a large picture of a baby on the cover poking out of the trash can because I thought someone had thrown my baby away!”

2.

“After feeding my newborn son I tried to fold some laundry but fell asleep in the pile of clothes with my boobs still out. I leaked milk all over the clothes and woke up drenched.”

3.

“I was co-sleeping (safely!) with my daughter when I became positive she was trying to nurse. I woke up to find myself shoving my nipple into her ear.”

4.

“My son had crawled completely under his blanket in the middle of the night and left a stuffed animal where he was… When my sleep-deprived self went to check on him and saw a stuffed kangaroo, I woke up my husband, crying, and yelled, ‘OUR SON TURNED INTO A KANGAROO!’ Then I fainted. When I came to, my husband was laughing and our son was looking at me through the crib bars.”

5.

“I was so overtired that when I finally got to sleep I had a night terror that my son was stuck inside my pillow, and I had to rip it apart to save him. (He was really asleep in his bed just fine.)”

6.

“I was attempting to do a load of laundry when I accidentally loaded the clothes into the dishwasher.”

7.

“I was mixing a bottle in the middle of the night when I put the water in, then the formula, and shook it up — without the top. Milk went EVERYWHERE. I don’t know who was more frustrated, me or the hungry baby.”

8.

“I tried to rock a pillow back to sleep. It wouldn’t settle down no matter how much I shushed it and patted its back (because the baby was still crying in her crib).”

9.

“My mom was holding the baby, and I had the cat in my lap. I wanted a drink, so I stood up, hoisted the cat up to my shoulder, supported his head, and carried him into the kitchen. I grabbed a soda and sat back down before I realized I could’ve, you know, just put the cat down on the floor.”

10.

“I went to the store in a tank top with ice packs strapped around my boobs on the OUTSIDE of the shirt. I only realized this as I was paying.”

11.

“I put the gallon of milk in the sink and the dirty bowl in the fridge.”

12.

“I have a 2-year-old and a 6-month-old and we co-sleep. One night the baby started fussing in her sidecar crib. I reached over to the wrong side of the bed, grabbed the toddler, and tried to get her to latch. She was wiggling in her sleep and waking up as I did this and eventually yelled, ‘NO BOOB, MAMA!’ loud enough to wake the dead.”

13.

“After many sleepless nights my husband and I went to Target with our 1-year-old daughter. We separated for a bit, and when we met back up I panicked and screamed, ‘Where’s our daughter?’ I was holding her.”

14.

“I was so frustrated that I couldn’t get more than two hours of sleep at a time that I beat our Roomba to hell. That was an expensive punching bag.”

15.

“I spent an hour shopping at Target, then couldn’t find my car keys. I decided to look for them by my car only to find it still running.”

16.

“I was so exhausted by the constant night feedings that I literally hugged my husband’s head instead of the baby and stuck my boob in his face.”

17.

“I walked to the supermarket without my purse. When I realized what I’d done I went home to get it, then left again without it.”

18.

“I kissed a pile of folded clean laundry on the ‘head’ while carrying it upstairs.”

19.

“I was making spaghetti and went to drain the noodles, except I forgot to get out the colander and proceeded to dump all of the noodles into the sink.”

20.

“I put my brand-new iPhone in the washing machine with my load of dirty laundry.”

And finally, a happy ending:

“Went to pick up a pizza, then got both kids back into the car and drove home. After unloading the kiddos, I couldn’t find my pizza anywhere. It was on the roof of my car, where I’d put it to get everyone buckled in! I was so excited that it hadn’t flown away and wasn’t ruined! It was the best roof pizza ever!”

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