5 Side Characters In Tales Who Want To Steal The Spotlight


Just like the attention-whore actors who tries to be the star of the movie despite their 3 min long supporting role...

1. Magic Mirror - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

One of the most inciting, trouble-stirring fantastic characters of all time. Although he could just prevent the trouble in the first place by simply telling evil queen "you are the fairest", he deliberately adds fuel on fire and tells "My Queen, you are the fairest here so true. But Snow White is thousand times more beautiful than you." 

Looking truthful, well-wisher and naive, he is actually an ill-hearted, evil and poisonous character who sets Snow White up. Instead of just saying "you are the most beautiful" and minding his own business, why does he have to find the exact whereabouts of the true miss universe? Speaking of universe, what kind of world is it that there is no any other cute girl except Snow White and the Queen? And, how is the evil queen beautiful anyways? She looks more like a middle-aged Math teacher from the middle school. How can you identify her as the fairest in the world? You know very well that she is not beautiful at all, and even Snow White is nothing like the fairest in the world; you are  lying just to make yourself more significant for the story. You know that if you keep telling the queen "you are the fairest" everyday,  she would get bored eventually and stop talking to you. That's why you don't mind provoking her against Snow white for your selfish reasons, causing a horrible murder; and ruining a story that could actually have ended very lovely with a final scene where queen and the snow white warmly hug each other. Hope you get broken very soon bastard!

2. Fairy Godmother - Cinderella

Make a beautiful night-dress out of Cinderella's shitty clothes, turn mice into horses, and pumpkin into a handsome coach; so a poor orphan girl can join the most popular party in the country. But all these great things expire at midnight?  May I just ask WHY? I mean by the time she gets prepared, arrives there and meet Prince, it will be already 11:30 probably.  Why are you hurrying her? Why can't you just make a proper spell that will not break before morning? You have enough power to turn the pumpkin into car but only for 3 hours? Who buys this bullshit? 

Cinderella might be calling you "Fairy Godmother", but you are in fact such a bad, old bitch!  Maybe you want to keep the prince for yourself, and  it has never been about helping her since the beginning. Instead you just wanted people to talk about your big "charity"!  You show up only once in the course of the story and somehow you are not around when shit happens. Because you are jealous, sneaky and horrible! Obviously, you are just a pathetic attention whore!

3. Spinning Lady - Sleeping Beauty

Throughout the entire story, there are only a few characters in total anyway. Sleeping beauty, mother, father, Maleficent the witch, and the prince who kisses the girl at the final scene. But who plays the key role that changes the fate of entire story? Of course the old lady who is illegally spinning with her spindle in one of the palace rooms, although the king forbade any sort of spinning all throughout the kingdom years ago. 

Has she been spinning in that room for 18 years? Didn't she get out of the room even for food or toilet during all these years, and see someone else on the corridor by chance? No one came to ask "do you have any spindle ma'am?"  Seriously, what is her deal? I mean the king literally mobilized the whole country to collect all the spindles, where was she? Congrats auntie, you became the key character of the tale without doing anything! It's no more about prince or princesses or king; it's all about you: the woman who managed to keep a spindle for 18 years without loosing or breaking it. Good work lady!

4. Hunter / Woodcutter - Little Red Riding Hood

I don't even know what to say to you hunter. I've heard so many tale characters, good or bad. But there was no one like you, who managed to make his literally 10-second-role a much bigger deal than it is, by bringing extreme level of violence into a bed time story that is supposed to be for kids. You show up at the final scene and demonstrate a very barbaric practice, and claim it's just for saving a young girl. But the ongoing dispute could have been settled in a much more peaceful way, if you hadn't intervened. But no! Of course as the only true man in the story, you had to cut open the sleeping wolf's stomach, rescue the girl and  fill the wolf's body with heavy stones. Yeah cause you had to be the hero right? What kind of childhood trauma did you have to come up with such a horrible punishment idea? How did you become this person? May God have mercy on your soul!

5. Mayor- Pied Piper of Hamelin

I don't know his exact job or responsibilities. I have no idea if he is some kind of Mayor , Count or even Duke. All I know is that he is cheap enough to break his promise and refuse to pay the piper who shows up and saves his ass when his town was in deep shit.

Your town is literally infested by mice; people are so angry that they can overthrow you in any moment, and some guy shows up and finds a solution. So why are you getting ugly after the guy did the job properly as he promised? Why don't you just pay the fee of his service as as you promised?

You were ready to give much more only a few days ago, during this mice invasion; but when threat is eliminated, you become such a bastard! What if those families whose kids were taken hang you in the middle of the town hall? Can we blame them? You are risking the lives of taxpayers, just because you don't want to give the money. It's their money in the first place dumbass! Just to get more focal and make your insignificant role look more important than it actually is, you are gambling over childrens' lives. I wish piper had not given the kids back, so we could have seen what citizens could actually do to you, you dirty, sick, money-loving pig.

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